Facing a Tragedy head on can Leave Open Doors for Blessings

In July of 2016, my wife an I were given the most strenuous challenge we had ever faced.

We were struggling for months, trying to bring a new life into this world. We wanted a baby. After trying for what seemed like years, we began having worries that there was something preventing us from receiving life’s greatest gift. It was tough to keep pushing, but we knew that we would be blessed soon. Just when we were running low on confidence, my wife gave me the amazing news that she was pregnant.

The joy, wonder, and pure excitement of the news never halted; we kept the feeling in our hearts every moment of every day. We were taking the next enormous step in our journey of life, and we were ready for it.

Our journey had other plans for us at that time though…

My wife was having some issues during her first trimester of the pregnancy. The symptoms she was having were often considered to be normal pregnancy symptoms, and even our doctors said there was nothing to worry about, but to take it easy. All I knew to do was make sure my wife was reassured that everything was OK. So that what I did.

Even after following doctor’s orders my wife was still in pain, and she was having some issues that caused her severe discomforts. By this time we were both very afraid, but were in denial of what could possibly be happening. I was so sure that we weren’t going to suffer through that pain.

After visiting the doctor again, my wife was given the news that she had a miscarriage…

Related: https://goodcompanyweb.wordpress.com/2016/10/04/coping-with-tragedy/

This news was scary, to say the least. It devastated us. Having a baby is what we were always thinking about, talking about, and trying to make happen. It finally happened, then it was taken right back from us.

After we learned of the miscarriage, the doctors had nothing left to say. My wife simply had to take it easy and wait for her body to return to its normal state. It wasn’t so simple. Never before had we ever dealt with anything like this. It was truly earth-shattering.

We cried, talked, distracted ourselves as much as possible, and cried a little more. We grieved for our unborn child, and began thinking again about what the future had in store for us. Just as we were getting back to some normalcy, life threw another curve at us.

A couple weeks later, my wife was having crippling pains. We had no idea what it was. She paid yet another visit to the hospital. The same hospital that told us of the miscarriage. After further examination, it became clear that she had in fact been the victim of an ectopic pregnancy. Her fallopian tube burst, and she was bleeding internally.

My wife almost lost her life. She was rushed to the operating room for surgery. The doctor’s operation was successful, but she had to remove one of my wife’s fallopian tubes. Thank the heavens my wife is still with me today, but she was left with a drastically decreased chance of becoming pregnant. It was a tough pill to swallow. I was still grateful she herself was safe.

The next battle to fight, after her recovery, was to return to our normal selves. It wasn’t as difficult as we were anticipating.

My wife and I knew that we were going through a defining time in our life. We knew that the choices we made, and the attitudes we kept would directly affect the way our lives would  play out in the near future. Being able to accept the fact that we were in the middle of a life-turning event is one of the greatest advantages we had while becoming happy again.

We were still a team. We made sure one another didn’t fall into a depressive state. If I saw her staring off in the distance, not fully present with me, I would put my hand on her shoulder, and tell her, “Baby, it’s OK.” I would create a connection with her and she would have a way of getting back in the room with me, not lost in her thoughts. She would do the same things for me. We would talk about anything that was on our minds. There was no silence between us, we didn’t keep thoughts from each other.

Communication was one of the biggest tools we had when returning to our normal selves.

My wife and I were both going through something serious. It was something we never went through before. We didn’t know exactly what to say to each other, and we didn’t know exactly what to do for each other. We did what felt right, and it turned out in the end that we were doing it right.

Being there for one another helped push us towards living a happier life again. We began living in the present, and dreaming of the future once more.

This tragic occurrence that took us off guard had the potential to tear us apart from each other, and the potential to tear us apart from the inside. Instead of letting life beat us down, we fought to stand strong on our feet once again; we came out of the battle stronger individuals, as well as a stronger couple.

We were dealt a hand. A tough hand. It would have been easy to give up and fold. But we didn’t fold. We played that hand the best we could, and we bet everything we had on it. After suffering through the pain, and after being scared of what was to come, we came out on top.

We never gave up on each other and we never gave up on ourselves.

After we returned to normalcy, we decided it was time to try and have a baby again. We were scared of how long it would take, and if it was still even possible after her surgery.

We kept our minds on a positive future, and a positive life to come. We never gave up hope. We never gave up on life.

We are now blessed to say that we have a baby girl on the way. My wife is 5 months in the pregnancy, and everything looks good. We will be having a healthy baby girl in June, 2017.

Life throws us curveballs sometimes. We get pushed around, and sometimes we are convinced that there is no reason to get back up. When that happens; when life pushes you down, you have to push back! We have to take the challenges as they come, and a lot of times we will have no preparations what-so-ever. The only thing we can, and need to be prepared for is the fact that life is going to trip you up sometimes. You just have to catch your balance and keep running in the right direction.

Don’t let a little sand in your eyes, or a scrape on your knee stop you from pursuing what you want in life. You have to keep striving for what you want. Positive attitude, and persistence will produce success every time. The moment you give in to opposition is the moment you give up on your goals, and give up on living the life you dream of.


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